Road Trip (A little late)

This past summer we went to San Antonio for one night.  We had to meet Jav's cousin Tony to talk about the sale of some property Jav's parents own in Mexico.  Honestly, because this was supposed to happen the weekend after school started, I was NOT looking forward to this trip.  But by the time we left I was geared up to make this a Fun, Fast and Furious Texas Road Trip.  And where do you stop for breakfast when traveling South?  Kolaches in West!  Where to you stop for lunch?  DAIRY QUEEN!!!  (Where, as the sign says, they are Always Hiring Management!  I wonder why?)

We also decided to take an afternoon visit to Natural Bridge Caverns because we've been REALLY wanting to take the boys and we thought we'd have some time to kill.  It turns out, though, that we didn't anticipate how crowded it would be, and that we should have reserved a time.  We had to wait, sometimes in the hot July weather, for 2 hours before our group went down in the casve.

Jojo was NOT impressed with the caverns.  Gabriel thought they were awesome.

I did too.  Pretty amazing stuff.

We didn't make it to the River Walk until about 9pm.  I was amazed the boys were still awake.  Gabriel thought the tall tower was the greatest piece of architecture he'd ever seen.  We sat right on the water, but the food at our restaurant was awful.  The boys ended up feeding the ducks with their dinners.  One of the ducks (a very cheeky one indeed), jumped up on the platform where our table sat over the water.  Here he is waiting for another handout.  

We couldn't find our car in the parking garage for a half hour, which delayed us getting home even more.  This is what happened before we even had a chance to brush his teeth.

I'm glad I had an attitude adjustment and decided to embrace the spirit of a true Texas Road Trip.  It was super fun!!!

Meaningful

While driving to Weatherford to finally watch one of my nephew's Little League games, I re-fell in love with a song.  I know that some people just can't or won't take Sting seriously, but I've always thought he was a terrific singer/songwriter.  I had pulled out his CD Mercury Falling a couple of weeks ago and realized that although I hadn't listened to it for years, it was still one of my favorites.  So heading west, the song, "Let Your Soul be Your Pilot" was playing away.  It's a song I've listened to many times and found uplifting.  And I must admit, I am a total sucker for any pop song with a choir in it.  There are several of Sting's songs on his later CDs that are very religious and spiritual, which surprised me.  On this listen, though, the realization hit me that these are perfect words for my kids. Words about what I hope they will figure out.  Words to let them know that they are not alone in this world, even when it seems at its darkest.  And that last verse.  Whoa.  This is what I feel for them now, and maybe one day when I'm gone they will realize that is how God feels for them.  "Let your pain be my sorrow, let your tears be my tears too.  Let your courage be my model, that the north you find will be true."  Father Paul, our current priest, ends every homily the same way.  He says, (twice for emphasis) "Let's be thankful we're still here, and let us remember God cares very deeply about us."

Let Your Soul Be Your Pilot

When you're down and they're counting
When your secrets all found out
When your troubles take to mounting
When the map you have leads you to doubt
When there's no information
And the compass turns to nowhere that you know well

Let your soul be your pilot
Let your soul guide you
He'll guide you well

When the doctors failed to heal you
When no medicine chest can make you well
When no counsel leads to comfort
When there are no more lies they can tell
No more useless information
And the compass spins
The compass spins between heaven and hell

Let your soul be your pilot
Let your soul guide you
He'll guide you well

And your eyes turn towards the window pane
To the lights upon the hill
The distance seems so strange to you now
And the dark room seems so still

Let your pain be my sorrow
Let your tears be my tears too
Let your courage be my model
That the north you find will be true
When there's no information
And the compass turns to nowhere that you know well

Let your soul be your pilot
Let your soul guide you
Let your soul guide you
Let your soul guide you upon your way...

The ethics of parenting

I have an acquaintance that I have not known long who mentioned in passing that she was "fascinated by Libertarians".  Based on her recent Facebook posts, I believe she may have moved herself right on into Full-Fledged Libertarianism since we had that conversation.  Along with some of the kooky (I think, at least), things she believes about government leadership, many of the articles and blogs she has posted on Facebook of late deal with how to raise your kids without grafting your own beliefs onto them.  In other words, parents should keep their own personal opinions on subjects to themselves, should let their kids figure stuff out, and develop their own ideas and opinions about things.

Well, I say the same thing to myself about this that I say when I read the kooky government posts:  good luck with all THAT!  Wouldn't it be worrisome that the morals and ethical beliefs they develop might come from school, friends, parents of freinds, pop culture, TV, or things they read online?  By God, it would be to me.  And don't we have the right, as parents, to explain the way we feel about certain things to our kids?  Isn't that just plain ole PARENTING in the truest sense of the word?

Let me get a little more specific.  I knew when I started to finally have kids that I would never be able to take them to the circus or rodeo.  The animals are held in captivity, in unnatural surroundings, and no matter how well the organization claims to treat them, I feel that forcing wild animals to perform for a human audience's entertainment is just wrong.

I have followed the good work of several animal organizations who allow former performing animals to "retire" to a life they were more naturally meant to lead.  The Elephant Sanctuary in Tennessee does not allow any contact between the public and the elephants living there, but they do have "Ele-cams" set up in various locations throughout the grounds, so that you can watch them playing with their toys or splashing in the pond.  The International Exoctic Animal Sanctuary in Boyd, TX takes in big cats, bears, and a few other types of animals.  Some of these were forced to perform for traveling circuses and flea markets.  Some just had to endure life as a side show, like the 11 bears IEAS recently won custody of from a closed down Bear Park in North Carolina, where they lived in concrete pits.  IEAS has behavioral specialists that work with their animals towards enrichment and rehabilitation.  They do allow planned tours of their grounds, but only small groups at a time, and no child younger than seven can visit.

The only reaction I had had to deal with so far was from other parents who were shocked that we do not let our kids experience these things.  They acted as if we were denying our kids some of the joys of childhood or something.  I have had so many negative reactions that recently when a coworker offered me six free tickets to the rodeos that are held every weekend in the Stockyards, I took them, even though they will not be used by us.  It was at this point I began to question whether or not it was right to keep my kids from these things based on my feelings and beliefs.

I knew I would have to face some challenging questions from Gabriel soon if he heard that one of his frends went to the circus or Stock Show.  Sure enough, the Shrine Circus recently rolled through Fort Worth and had billboards up and signs on bus stop benches.  He got really excited and asked if we could go, and I took my deep breath and tried my best to explain why we could not.  I told him about the Elephant Sanctuary, and that we need to start checking the Ele-cams.  I told him we would try to go to an animal-free circus, like Cirque De Soleil, some time in the near future.  He seemed to understand but be a little disappointed.  He always pointed out the signs when we passed them, and said a little wistfully, "The circus is still going on."  "Yes," I would answer, "and I hope you understand why we cannot go."

Then last week my friend Cathy posted on Facebook that she strongly suggested anyone who had ever been to SeaWorld watch the documentary that was airing on CNN that night, "Blackfish".  It uncovered the many accidents and near-death incidents there had been between orcas and the trainers at Sea World since the company started back in the 70's.  It also had interviews from former trainers about the fact that SeaWorld did not report these incidents to the public, or to newly-hired trainers.  There were marine biologists discussing how wrong it was to contain these huge animals in concrete pools, train them to perform, and expect them to stay aggression-free.  And how wrong it is to take the babies away from their moms at 4 months, when calves normally stay with their moms for two years in the wild.

I have been to SeaWorld three times, and had always thought about all of the good that SeaWorld has done for conservation while I was there.  This was not mentioned at all in the movie, which I initially thought was unfair.  No current employee of SeaWorld agreed to be interviewed for the film.  But the footage in the film speaks for itself.  I was shocked, horrified and saddened by what I saw and learned.  I came away realizing how similar the plight of the orcas is to the sad life of circus elephants, and was a little ashamed and dumbfounded that I had never made the connection before.  Orcas are beautiful creatures, and belong in open water.  Period.  Any attempt to contain them and make them perform is cruel and ultimately leads to tragedy.

So now we can mark "A trip to SeaWorld" off of our list of things we might do in the future.  And can you believe that the very day that "Blackfish" aired, Gabriel asked me when we were going back to SeaWorld?  (What a sense of humor you have, sometimes, God!)  I put off the real answer by telling him we could not afford a trip anytime soon.

Some might think we're hypocritical by taking them to the zoo and not these other places.  My reasoning behind that is that there is a big difference between seeing the animals in person, in all their majesty and greatness, compared to seeing them online or on paper.  If the boys see them in person, hopefully as they get older it will instill some sense of caring what happens to those animals in the wild.  Not that it doesn't upset me when I see ANY animal in captivity, but I've learned to harden myself at the zoo.

My husband, thankfully, is completely behind the decision.  He now has some very different opinions from the ones he had when we first met.  So I am beginning to feel a little more confident about our decision to avoid certain events.  The way I have to look at it is that I am teaching my children compassion for all of the earth's creatures from an early age, and how can that be a bad thing?

Baby shower

My cousin's oldest daughter recently turned 18.  I am not using names and am not sharing pics of her, since I didn't ask her if that would be ok.  Her short story:  She graduated a year early, and had plans to go to Tarleton and major in Veterinary Medicine.  She was a bit of a tomboy and had not had many boyfriends all throughout high school.  She thought she had met the love of her life last year, and got pregnant.  The plans changed.  The boyfriend turned out to be a jerk, and his entire family was unsupportive of her.  She has since moved in with her grandmother, and is fixing up a room for she and her baby boy.  She still has plans to attend Weatherford Junior College in the evenings, while her grandmother (who has worked in a day care with the 6-12 month old babies her entire adult life), watches Aiden.  

In a moment of craziness mixed in with love for my cousin, I offered to host a baby shower for her.  I think I was also influenced by an understanding that we all make stupid mistakes when we are young, and even though those mistakes can turn out to be wonderful, I wanted her to know that our family fully supports her and celebrates this baby.  I have never even co-hosted a baby shower.  But I have attended many, including my own.  The family immediately started thanking me, saying they had been looking for a place big enough to have it.  Oops.  Should've talked that over with my husband.  They wanted to have it the weekend before Gabriel's birthday.  We decided to postpone his party a week so I could have a weekend off to rest up in between the crazy.  But I really got lucky, because Little Momma's grandmother helped out so much that I was left with three main responsibilities:  Decorating, games and the food.  She took care of some decorations, all paper products, party favors and the cake.  

Little Momma wanted a jungle theme, and I found a zebra tablecloth that I knew I wanted to use.  I also thought about palm trees and rope for vines.  I had been wanting to get some new house plants anyway, and I found the two ponytail palms below on sale.  I also bought one big palm to sit on the floor somewhere around where the guest of honor was opening gifts.  My sweet dad came and helped me get the rope vines hung all around the table and the living room, and I wrapped green crepe ribbon around the rope.  I also bought several stuffed jumgle animals at Toys R Us that I thought were adorable, and that I gave to her to decorate the nursery after the shower.  I hung our Curious George monkeys from the vines.  I got a huge giraffe balloon to tie to Little Momma's chair.  The crowning touch on the decorations were the big bowls of bananas I put everywhere in the house, including the bathroom.  Of course, I realize that I probably got jungle and African savannah confused, but I don't care, I think it looked really cool.

I came up with 2 games, a celebrity baby name game and the Bag Guessing Game, showcased in the picture above in front of the mirror.  My boss has given around 30 baby showers, and this is the one game she's led in all of them.  Each bag is labeled with a letter of the baby's first and middle name.  Then, inside is something that starts with the corresponding letter and is an item for babies.  Whoever gets the most guesses right, wins the prize.

On the food, since this is the Most People Don't RSVP era we are living in, I decided to aim for 25-30 people (they had invited around 40).  Little Momma had been sending me food Pins from Pinterest that I saved in a big folder.  I decided on going with a watermelon bowl fruit salad, Skinny southwest chicken dip, caprese pasta salad, tortilla pinwheels with cream cheese, bacon, pesto and smoked turkey, chocolate covered strawberries and apple pie bites.  I am determined that from now on I will remember to take pictures of the food, because it all looked amazing in my opinion.  I worked my tail off Friday, then had help from Little Momma and her family with getting the fruit cut up for the watermelon bowl and making the tortilla pinwheels.  My cousin and I grew up together and spent around 7-8 years drifting farther and farther apart for various reasons.  Then we found each other on Facebook, and have been a part of each other's lives again ever since.  We were laughing and reminiscing in the kitchen before the shower started and having so much fun.  It's true that your cousins are your first closest friends

It turned out that out of the 40 people they invited, Little Momma had assured me that 10-15 were close family and would be showing up.  But that was all who came.  NONE of her friends showed.  I thought that was pretty lame, even if I do live 20 minutes or so from where she and her friends live.  But we still managed to have a really fun day.  And she felt special and loved by the 15 people there, so it was a success.  And Jav and I got to eat tortilla pinwheels in our lunches the entire next week.  Yum!

Believing, part two.

When Tito passed away, we did not think it was a good idea to take Gabriel or Joel to the visitation or the buriel, but brought Gabriel to the funeral.  He was really upset all week, and I told him I thought attending the service might be comforting to him, since it was held in our regular parish with songs he would recognize.  And I think I was right, albeit I had not thought of his questions when he saw the casket being brought in before the service started.  I wasn't very prepared to answer his, "What's that?"  But I struggled through.  Gabriel then said, "I thought Heaven was up THERE (pointing up), not down in the ground (pointing down)."  So Jav launched into a rather heroic explanation of the soul leaving the body.   This seemed to leave Gabriel wondering, but I think he was ok.

We had told him that we would visit the gravesite in a few weeks so that we could sit down and talk with Tito, because he could still hear us.  He just couldn't talk back.  This also seemed to blow Gabriel's mind a little, and I'm not sure how comfortable he was when we took both boys for a visit for the first time.  I tried to get him to talk but I could tell he thought it was weird and didn't say much.  I made a joke and asked if Tito liked his new neighbors, which Jav laughed at but Gabriel just looked sad.  Sigh.  There's just not much else you can do, I guess, other than keep the spirit of his grandfather alive by telling him stories, and visiting his gravesite in the hope that maybe it will give him some peace.  But if it keeps upsetting him maybe we need to lay off for awhile.

But none of that has to do with my story.  Soon after we got out of the car and found Tito's buriel site, we spotted a rather large white dog about 100 yards away.  It just appeared from behind one of the larger mausoleums.  I was a little concerned because I did not see a leash on it.  And Jojo gets pretty nervous around strange dogs.  I pointed it out to Jav and he started watching it too, notating that it was a pretty dog and didn't look like a stray.  But there was no owner around that we could see.  It sniffed around the mausoleum a bit, then just laid down on the grass.  Now, I like to think that I know dog behavior, and this dog was definitly not a stray.  They are way too skittish to ever lay down in the middle of the day, especially with people nearby.  And the dog never even glanced our way.

All of this started to make me feel really strange.  I looked at Jav watching the dog, and knew he was thinking some strange thoughts about it too.  We were both looking all around for an owner, but there was just no one.  Then another strange thing happened that really blew me away.  Joel started walking towards the dog!  And Joel does NOT walk towards dogs, he runs the other way.  We told him no, he needed to come back with us, because we didn't know that doggie.  The dog just continued peacefully laying in the grass, not asleep, but with his head up.  But he never looked over or seemed the least bit concerned even when Joel had been walking that direction.  Then just as suddently, the dog got up and walked back around the mausoleum where we couldn't see him any more.

By this time we were done with our visit anyway and curiousity overcame Jav and I.  We got back in the car and drove around, looking for some sign of the dog or a person, but there was nothing.  Like it had just vanished.  Jav was so overwhelmed about the whole thing he even asked the cemetary owners when he had to sign some final paperwork if any of the groundskeepers own a dog.  The gentleman looked at him very strangely and said no, they don't allow any dogs on the grounds, with the exception of one woman who visits her husband's grave with her dog every morning on a leash.  And her dog is not white.

So, without voicing it at the time to each other, we both thought it might have been Tito.  When we were talking about it the week afterward, Jav had told Sandra our story.  She reminded Jav about their family Christmas ornaments.  They each picked out ornaments to represent themselves on the tree, years ago.  Jav's dad picked out a white dog.  I wish I could explain more about the moment, how very at ease the dog was.  How peaceful the time was while we were all out there.  I now believe, without a doubt, that it was him, welcoming us to his body's new resting place, and trying to make us feel better.

A Sad Summer

We had a hard, hard summer.  Jav's dad went into the hospital, then rehab, then nursing care within a month starting in May.  We had Sandra's wedding, a joyful event, but bittersweet when we realized that her dad really did not grasp what was going on.  Then my mom went into the hospital with heart issues for four days.  Then Jav's mom went to the ER because of digestive issues that have been plaguing her for years.

We went into full crisis mode.  I scrambled to find babysitting for the boys so I could still get some hours in at work.    Jav and his sister took turns visiting their dad every night for dinner until he went to bed. They explained to him where their mom was, but he would forget, or perhaps even not believe them.  She spent two weeks in the hospital after having major surgery to have part of her intestine and her appendix removed.  It took a week to determine if her digestive system was working well.  It was something that will improve her quality of life immensely, but it came at such a bad time.

We visited with Jav's dad just before we left for our Galveston trip and just before she returned home.  I was shocked at how thin he had become since Sandra's wedding.  He was very bitter, and looked so confused and angry.  It broke my heart to see him, and bothered Gabriel so much we decided we couldn't let him visit unless we knew he was having a good day.  We went on our trip and had a fantastic time.  I think it was an understatement to say that we needed to get away for some fun and laughs with the boys.  We got back late Sunday afternoon, and started the post-trip drudgery of unpacking, tackling mounds of laundry, running to the store to get by until a big grocery trip, etc...  He knew Sandra was expecting to take care of his dad Sunday night, so decided not to visit.

We got a call early Monday morning that his dad had gone to the hospital, but they didn't say why.  I guess in retrospect we should have known what was coming, but we didn't.  He called around 9 to let me know his father, Celestino, had passed away in his sleep sometime early Monday morning.  Even though we knew it was coming, it was still a shock that it came so quickly.  And with so much guilt and "wish we could have done this or that" surrounding us.  His mother took it the hardest, of course,  She had only had the strength to visit him one time since getting home from the hospital.  I'm sure it shocked and saddened her when she saw him, and was too much for a 77-year-old recovering from such major surgery.  Everyone has said, "It's just one of those things that coudn't be helped...".  And this is always followed by, "...and it is so very, very sad."

Yes it is.  He was a wonderful mixture of old school and modern thinking.  He had stories of growing up on a farm and being so proud not when he got his first car, but when he got a horse of his very own.  He came to America to work and earn money for he and his new bride, Consuelo.  But something about America grew on him.  He brought her here, with a promise of going back and starting a family after he worked for a few years.  Then Javier, then his sister, came along and Tino decided he wanted a better life for his kids.  This was way back before so many Mexican nationals were brave enough to do it.  He and Consuelo became U.S. citizens while retaining their Mexican citizenship.  He worked hard to send his kids through Catholic school.  He earned lasting respect from many Nolan students during the years he coached their baseball team.  But he also made sure his kids spent summers in Monterrey, so they would understand where they came from and carry on some of the culture.  I have such respect for what he and Consuelo accomplished here, away from large familial support and surrounded by mosty white families.  They carved out a life, like pioneers staking their claim, and sent both kids to college.  It still blows my mind.

Tino was a stern but loving father, and was quite intimidating the first few times I was around him.  But as soon as we were married, and I mean the night of the wedding, he started calling me "Mija", just as he did Sandra.  It moved me and made me feel so welcome to be a part of their family.  He always had a great story, he loved meeting and talking to all kinds of different people.  And when the time came he was a fun and doting grandfather.  It breaks my heart to think that the boys might not remember him.  I was 8 when I lost my grandfather, and have some specific memories that I carry with me, but most of it is very vague and blurry.  I think that is how Gabriel's memories will be.  Joel may not remember him at all.  So it will be up to us to explain, show pictures, tell stories and paint a picture of the wonderful person his Tito was.  Although we wish we had more to tell him.  Why is it such human nature to halfway listen to the stories, or tune out when we think we've heard them before?  Only to berate ourselves for not soaking up every word once the person is gone and the stories have ended.  But we will try.

Even though it is a bit of a relief to know he isn't so upset, angry and confused any longer, I miss him terribly.

Believing, part one.

When we got married, a strange thing happened that those of us in the know all agree was a very special thing to witness.  Sometime towards the end of the ceremony, a small black and white cat wandered into the Herb Farm courtyard where we were.  It kept its distance at first, but once the majority of attendees had headed to the bar and tables to wait out pictures, the cat made its presence known in bolder ways.

A couple of times it would wander close to Jav and I during the photo shoot.  At one point the photographer asked, "Do you guys know this cat?  It seems so comfortable around you."  We told him we'd never seen it before.  Then during one shot, when Jav and I were seated on a bench at the back of the gardens, the cat actually jumped in my lap.  It was at that point that the little voice I had been ignoring in the back of my head shouted out, "It's Mamaw!"  I think I may have mentioned it to Jav out loud, but that was all at first.

My grandmother had passed away a month after Jav and I started dating.  She was my favorite person in the whole world, and she never got to meet the true love of my life.  The whole reason I had considered Fredericksburg as a place to get married, originally, was that when my family came to her memorial service, I had said that it was so good to see everyone, but I wished the reason we were all together wasn't such a sad one.  Then Fredericksburg started to really make sense when we realized Jav's family from Monterrey could meet us there and not have to make the much longer drive to Fort Worth.  Additionally, it really started to seem perfect when you realize what a blending of German and Hispanic cultures Fredericksburg has championed for decades.  But my thoughts about Mamaw were the ones that got the ball rolling.

So back to the wedding.  My grandmother was a very strong-willed person.  So it made sense to think that she would have thought of a way to attend her granddaughters' wedding.  And in her own way, let me know without a doubt who she was.  I think we told my mom, Jav's sister, and maybe a few other people about the cat during the reception.  I know I told my friend Cobra, who totally believed in that sort of thing and was certain it was true.  The cat disappeared once the sun went down and the music started, or at least we just didn't notice her after that.  We asked the Herb Farm employees afterwards if that was one of their regular cats, and they had never seen it before that day.  Our photographer was so entranced by the story that he checked in a couple of months later and found out they had found a home for the cat, and he was kind enough to email me to let me know.

I have very complicated, to say the least, feelings about religion and the after-life.  I won't go into all of that here.  All I know is that there are mysteries that we come across in life that are hard to explain, and this was one that I can easily explain.  I know, without a doubt, that that little cat was my grandmother for the couple of hours that we saw her lingering.  I was moved and happy beyond belief that she had figured out a way to be there, and it made the day even more special.  It may sound completely crazy, but it's what I believe.

Bad judgement call?

Probably. But in my defense...

We love Brave Combo at our house. Mostly because of the Christmas CD. It's the first one we listen to every year, and it has become very near and dear to my kids' hearts. Their music is, well, fun. Lots of Polkas, but also Cha-Cha-Chas, Rhumbas, Waltzes, the Conga, and every show has a version of The Chicken Dance and The Hokey Pokey. We saw them at an outdoor festival when Gabriel was very young, but he doesn't remember. We've since pondered taking them to see a show, but they always seem to start too late, or be in a club.

Then I got the Levitt Pavilion Fall schedule. Levitt is an outdoor stage, with grass to dance, sit, eat, drink or lay down and listen on. FREE concerts, with the exception of one fundraising one each year. They have a summer schedule, with concerts Wed - Sun night, Memorial Day weekend through the 4th of July. Wednesday is kids' bands. We've been twice. Once each year since we found out about it. We always talk about going more, but then we have other plans, or we talk ourselves out of it because it would be way past the boys' bedtime, or it's too hot, etc....

Then I found out that their Fall concert opener each year is.....drumroll please.....BRAVE COMBO! When I told Gabriel he was so excited. We've had it marked on the calendar for 2 months.

The day before the concert, both boys started sniffling, and Gabriel's teacher informed me when I picked him up that she thought he might have a little fever. Rough nights for both boys (and mommy), so I decided not to send them to school the day of the show. I think in the back of my head I was still hoping they might have enough energy to do the concert. Yes, I am one of those parents who thinks it's okay to miss a day at school to do something fun once in awhile. There are lots of ways to get a good education in life. But as the day wore on I started thinking it probably wasn't a good idea and had to break it to Gabriel that I didn't think we would make the concert after all. The response was Big Fat tears. Sigh. We finished our quiet day, naps for all, and headed to Babe's Chicken Dinner House to have a goodbye dinner with Jav's aunt, who was going back to Mexico after staying with his mom for a month. The boys seemed ok, but droopy. I was resigned about our decision.




 But then we went to our cars, and realized that Levitt is only about two blocks from Babe's parking lot. You could hear the band start up. I'm not sure what came over me at that point. A wave of selfishness? Prickly Heat? I was a polka-obsessed zombie. How DARE these summer colds get in the way of our fun that we'd had planned for this long? We got in the car, found a closer parking spot, and went on in. My family looked at me as if I had lost my mind.

It was PACKED. We struggled to find a patch of grass big enough for all four of us. It was also HOT. But Jav got snow cones. I tried to get Gabriel to go do the Twist with me, he started panicking on the way down to the dance "green", but I told him no one was watching him. Everyone was having way too much fun. One of the things I love about Levitt shows is the range of people, races, and ages you get. There are grandparents, parents and kids all sitting together enjoying the music. Couples on dates, single people who just walked up with their dogs, UTA college students. It's all very laid back. So Gabriel did the Twist, which I was very proud of him about. When the lead singer announced they were going to do, "Sway, so get ready to Cha-Cha-Cha!", this couple in their 70's got up and walked out to the empty street the city blocks off for Levitt concerts. They proceeded to start dancing, REALLY well, to the point where a crowd gathered. I really wanted to take their picture, but I think that's rude if you don't ask first in that type of situation. It's one of those moments that I'll never forget - ever in my life. They really did set the mood for the whole crowd. We all four went up to watch this Greek wedding dance, which was too wild for us to join in. Then Gabriel and I did The Chicken Dance in a circle with a bunch of strangers, and had a blast. Then we all jitterbugged to Wooly Bully. I actually felt like I was about to have heat stroke at that point, so we rested. We went back up for the Hokey Pokey, then at the very end I tried to show G how to polka right around where we were sitting, because alot of folks had already headed to their cars.

During all of this the boys were looking droopier and droopier. When we got to the car after the show (probably 10:15 or so), it was still 101. Yikes. Gabriel was exhausted but jubilant on the way home. I was so proud of him for getting over that silly shyness and getting out there to dance his patooty off! This show he will remember.


So Gabriel first got worse, and coughed a bunch the next day, but then started to get better. Joel just seemed to have a touch of it and was fine the next day. I, however, started feeling worse and worse as Saturday dragged on. By 3am Sunday morning I almost had Jav drive me to the ER. I couldn't breathe, felt like I was going to cough up a lung, but somehow made it through one of the scariest nights I've ever had. I went to Care Now when they opened the next morning, was diagnosed with an upper respiratory infection, got a steroid shot and immediately started feeling better. When I told my mom the concert story, I beat her to it - "I know, mom, it was idiotic". She replied, as nicely as possible,"Yep, that's what I was thinking." Idiotic, perhaps, but fun.  But I won't be going to any more outdoor concerts when it's that stinkin' hot outside.

No computer, no blog :-(

Our desktop hard drive on and off button went out about two months ago. We figured it was from Joel pushing it in as hard as he could, over and over again, and breaking it. But no, Jav took it in today and was told it would cost $200 to get it fixed, it was more than just the button. And a newer, faster one costs $400.00. Our laptop is around five or six years old, and started popping completely off while we were in the middle of things about three weeks ago. It would just shut down with no battery warning or anything. Then the little "mousepad" area where you navigate started sticking, and finally got to the point where I was having to almost pop the piece up and almost off to get it to work. Then it stopped working too. NOT GOOD COMPUTER GODS (which have sure been laughing at me behind my back for the last two weeks. We still have some hope that replacing the battery and little mousepad thingie will save the laptop. So for almost a month we have been using Jav's work computer at night. During the day I've been struggling (in a totally First World sense) with using my phone to do internet-y things. I have missed out on upating my blog, We have been through some changes, some happy, some sad in the weeks that I have missed. I'll try to get caught up, but at my own speed (lately very turtle-like). We haven't really budgeted for a new computer, and weren't going to put one on the list for Santa this year. But now on the list it must go. More to come.

A week of cousin fun!

We have had the pleasure of having Cade and Macy come to spend the night several times this summer.  It is always jam-packed crazy fun, and we all sleep really well after our fun days!  The week of July 4th, they came Monday morning.  I decided to take them to the Japanese Gardens.  At first I thought, they are going to be bored.  But then I remembered that when my brother and I were kids, my grandparents used to take us there.  It was a magical place to us, with its bridges, waterfalls, stepping stones and giant koi.  Why shouldn't these kids feel the same way?  

Well, I was right.  Gabriel had been several times with our neighborhood Moms group, but the for the other three it was there first visit.    We walked every inch of the place, sometimes doubling back and seeing things again.  They loved it.  We saw a raccoon right off the bat, had to convince Macy that those bugs were non-stinging dragonflies, not huge stinging wasps, and had one, "oops I dropped Joel's feet in a pond" moment while trying to walk the stepping stones.  We all had a good laugh about that.  But I crowned myself "Mom of the Day" when I found dry socks in the backpack.  Go me!  

Oh, and the only thing I had been worried about was the heat.  Well, we have had some freakish good luck with weather in Texas this summer, and a dry cool front had moved through the day before.  The high was only supposed to be 92 that day, and it was so nice the whole time we were there.

I love every picture we took there, but this one above is my favorite.  I think I may need to get that one enlarged and framed.

We spent two hours there, then it was lunchtime.  I had planned to take them to Kincaid's on Camp Bowie a little before lunch hour rush, but we ended up getting there at exactly noon.  So much for good planning.  But these kids are all really well behaved when I take them places.  I never imagined I would be trying to handle four of them on my own, but it is a piece of cake.  Joel and I stood in line and the three older kids just sat and talked.  For a LONG time.  But man, did the conversation stop when the food came.  We were all famished after our morning trek.

And of course, I had to get everyone dessert.  It's the law!  Macy tried her first fried pie, Cade and I had banana pudding, and G & J enjoyed some vanilla ice cream.  We were pretty much the only group in there with kids, and everyone kept walking by our table and smiling.  A few had a look of pity, like, "wow you have your hands full", but those people just don't get it.  I have true FUN with these kids.  I think it's a day we'll all remember for a long time.

 On to the 4th of July!  I had considered going to the Arlington parade because several folks had told me how awesome it was.  Real floats, bands, and such.  But I knew I would feel guilty if I missed the neighborhood one, and of course they were at the same time.  We weren't disappointed, though, especially since the fire truck finally made an appearance.  It's very down-home.  At one point a man in a convertible was adjusting the Uncle Sam hat on his bloodhound.  I love my friend LaWayne's El Camino (lowest parade picture), that I truly think she bought just to decorate and ride in the parade!

We bought Fort Worth Cats tickets, along with Philip and April and the kids.  Your ticket included a prime Fort Worth Fourth fireworks watching seat after the game.  We thought this might be better than hanging out on the banks of the Trinity, where people had been soaking up the sun and drinking since 2 pm.  A little more family-friendly!  The Cats won, the kids had a blast during the game, and our front row seat of downtown FW and fireworks was wonderful!

And if that weren't enough for one week, we had a late Father's Day celebration at our house on Sunday.  Along with Mom and Dad and my brother's family we had my cousin's family and her dad.  I must brag about the food.  My brother and I came up with the menu, when we realized we were both thinking about pulled pork sandwiches.  I cooked the pork in the slow cooker all night long the night before.  It came out really, really well.  My sister-in-law brought cole slaw to top off the sandwiches, and some of the best homemade potato salad I've ever eaten.  My cousin's husband Vinney brought beans that were out of this world.  My mom made brownies and I made banana pudding.  This crew loves to cook and eat!

Uncle Dave, April, Uncle Dennis, Jav and Joel (Mom, I'm sorry you were cut out!)

Cade, Dad, Gabriel, Macy and Philip

My first cousin Kristen's husband Vinney and their oldest daughter, Rianna.  Rianna is expecting and is due in October.  And his 38 year old sister just had her first baby, so he gets to be an uncle for the first time, and then a grandpa right around the corner! 

Me and my sweet dad.