Jojo started karate classes two times a week back in mid-August, the same week the boys started school. We knew G had tons going on outside of school so we thought it would be good for Joel to have an afterschool activity, at least until Spring baseball starts up next March. We knew that a karate school existed in Arlington nearby where the boys have swimming lessons in the summers. We visited one Saturday, and the couple who run the place answered our questions and let Joel take the 2nd half of class. They seemed very nice and well organized, and we were impressed by the kids we saw that day. We paid for a month with no contract, then decided to sign him up for a six-month contract. And I am rueing the day for that decision.
Maybe they are all cash-swallowing piranhas. I had been thinking it would only be one class a week. They advised that most kids signed up for three-times-per-week classes. Two would still be ok, but once a week did not allow for the student to remember things and therefore they wouldn't really advance. The monthly fee seemed high, but since we didn't shop around maybe it was competitive. When it came time for Joel's first promotion test to the next level belt, there was a fee for that. Then everyone started talking about the next Tournament. Which of course means another fee when you sign up your kid. This school supposedly puts on really good tournaments, according to many of the parents. Other schools from as far away as Houston come to participate in them. But the parents are needed to be scorekeepers for the matches. After we'd been there a month, we were expected to stay late after class and learn how to keep score in a sparring contest. We weren't asked, they just made it hard for you to leave without looking like a sad, uninvolved parent.
So all other parents now think I am a sad, uninvolved parent. I did NOT sign on for all the extra stuff they are throwing at us, I would come home and gripe to Jav. They have had a Karate School swim day, picnic and this week a Halloween party. Why can't I just take my kid, once a week, for a class? Is it so wrong to want that?
Finally, after realizing that Jav and I were having none of the scorekeeping training, the wife gave up and asked if we would just like to watch since it was our first tournament. Joel still had to prepare just like the other kids as if he was participating. I don't like the idea of them sparring at that age. And the worse thing that has happened, that made my mommy hair on the back of my neck stand up, was the day they were paired off to spar so the parents could practice keeping score. Shihan (master) Jorge pretended to be the judge making the hand signals. Joel and the new student, Luke, went last. They had no preparation whatsoever and didn't know what to do. Considering this I thought they both did really well. But all the older boys, and even some younger ones from their class, started laughing at them. Shihan never noticed because he was so wrapped up in training the parents. I was livid. It took all of my willpower to not stand up and tell off the boys, tell the Master what I thought of him and his wife, grab Joel and head out the door for good.
Jav calmed me down, something he's gotten very used to doing in the past 10 years. Then the next session the wife pulled me aside to ask why we hadn't signed Joel up for the tournament yet. I told her again that Jav was just going to bring him to watch this time, and she asked, "But has Joel said he wants to be in it?" I told her that Joel doesn't really comprehend what's going on, and doesn't know what a tournament is. Then she laid the guilt trip down even harder, "But all of them will be getting a trophy for participating, and Joel is not going to get one." Ugh. First of all, I have such issues with "everyone gets a trophy" mentality. And secondly, can you believe the pushiness?
But all bitching aside, Joel loves it. And I think it's been good for his confidence and balance. One of his classmates from school, just by chance, is in his karate class, and they are two peas in a pod now. And I must admit to myself, that aren't they just doing what the cub scouts have been trying to do - get the parents involved so the kids keep coming? Even so, I don't like their tactics of trying to shame parents into helping. We wil be shopping around for a new place for Jojo to take after baseball seasons's over,
Thursday, October 30, 2014
Friday, October 24, 2014
Shopping: It's worse than the dentist
I'm taking a break from Colorado posting. We lost our internet connection after a bad storm we had three weeks ago and I have not been able to use anything but my phone to connect. I have missed posting in here! I've taken to jotting down ideas for posts on little sticky notes at work. We'll see how many actually turn into reality. I have had alot on my mind lately.
Because there will be some serious ones coming, I'm starting out with a bit of fluff. I want to talk about shopping. And how my attitude towards it has changed in the last 30 years.
I used to consider myself a stylish person, as is my mother and as was her mother before her. The only trouble was, I could blow a huge wad of money on clothes in a very short amount of time. This continued all through my 20's and into my 30's. But sometime along in there came some responsibility. I didn't want to have credit card debt for years to come. I knew I would have to get a handle on these binge shopping trips. So my trips to the mall became fewer, and I would go only when I really needed something, like a new pair of jeans.
Then came marriage, owning our first home, and a tighter budget. Then came the things that foever ruined me from wanting to go shopping like before. CHILDREN. (Sinister Dah Duh Dum!!!!! in the background). When you first have them you are so overwhelmed that you can't even think about clothes and don't give a crap what you look like. Then you realize you must face people in public from time to time, and your body is completely misshapen and doesn't fit into ANYTHING in your entire closet. So you are forced to go shopping. But it's impossible to focus if you have a kid with you, even an infant. Since you have no idea what size you wear anymore, you must actually go through the trouble of trying things on, sometimes multiple times. When you have 15 minutes while the baby is asleep to do this, it's not surprising that you leave with one top that doesn't really seem to fit like it did in the store when you get home. So you start buying things here and there online, daring the Shopping Gods to send you something that doesn't fit. Which they always take you up on and you lose.
I think I took Gabriel with me to the mall approximately five times in a stroller. I am so clutzy anyway, I would invariably run into clothes racks, sweater displays and fellow shoppers as I stumbled through the aisles. When Joel came I can honestly say that I took him to the mall once. I hated those stroller memories so much that I just carried him through the store. Yeah, that was a good idea. You can't sift through the clothes on a rack while lugging a 20 pound 6-month-old on your hip.
Then there is the money, or lack thereof. I try to ask for giftcards for birthday and Christmas gifts. My mom tells me when things are on sale. And God bless her, she is really the person who has kept me in anything remotely stylish since I've had children. She hands down things that she doesn't wear that much, and she takes me shopping when I'm really desperate. I had a few successful trips with my wonderfully sophisticated and stylish mom. But it was on one of those trips that I realized something.
I HATE the mall now. Despise it. It taunts me because nothing seems to fit right. It confuses me because I have no idea what is fashionable anymore. It laughs at me glancing at endless racks and racks of clothes that I have no idea how to put together. It frustrates me because I need so many things, and I can't figure out what to look for first. It used to be my friend. But no more. We are now sworn enemies.
Internet shopping has become a somewhat better friend. One that occaisionally still lets me down with fit, but I'm learning which retailers sell things that seem to fit me and which ones don't. If I continue to have my way, the only mall trips we will make in the future are the twice a year visits to Striderite for the boys' shoes. As long as we are in and out in an hour, I'm ok. On these trips it's hilarious to watch their faces as we explore unknown territory for them. "ALOT of people come to the mall, right Mommy?" "Why does everyone need so much stuff?" "That's a Food Court? Cool!!!!" They walk around with their mouths hanging open like hillbillies in the Big City for the first time.
Maybe one day I'll tell them how years ago their mom could walk the best stores, spot the hippest items and be headed back to the car loaded down with cute outfits in around an hour.
Because there will be some serious ones coming, I'm starting out with a bit of fluff. I want to talk about shopping. And how my attitude towards it has changed in the last 30 years.
I used to consider myself a stylish person, as is my mother and as was her mother before her. The only trouble was, I could blow a huge wad of money on clothes in a very short amount of time. This continued all through my 20's and into my 30's. But sometime along in there came some responsibility. I didn't want to have credit card debt for years to come. I knew I would have to get a handle on these binge shopping trips. So my trips to the mall became fewer, and I would go only when I really needed something, like a new pair of jeans.
Then came marriage, owning our first home, and a tighter budget. Then came the things that foever ruined me from wanting to go shopping like before. CHILDREN. (Sinister Dah Duh Dum!!!!! in the background). When you first have them you are so overwhelmed that you can't even think about clothes and don't give a crap what you look like. Then you realize you must face people in public from time to time, and your body is completely misshapen and doesn't fit into ANYTHING in your entire closet. So you are forced to go shopping. But it's impossible to focus if you have a kid with you, even an infant. Since you have no idea what size you wear anymore, you must actually go through the trouble of trying things on, sometimes multiple times. When you have 15 minutes while the baby is asleep to do this, it's not surprising that you leave with one top that doesn't really seem to fit like it did in the store when you get home. So you start buying things here and there online, daring the Shopping Gods to send you something that doesn't fit. Which they always take you up on and you lose.
I think I took Gabriel with me to the mall approximately five times in a stroller. I am so clutzy anyway, I would invariably run into clothes racks, sweater displays and fellow shoppers as I stumbled through the aisles. When Joel came I can honestly say that I took him to the mall once. I hated those stroller memories so much that I just carried him through the store. Yeah, that was a good idea. You can't sift through the clothes on a rack while lugging a 20 pound 6-month-old on your hip.
Then there is the money, or lack thereof. I try to ask for giftcards for birthday and Christmas gifts. My mom tells me when things are on sale. And God bless her, she is really the person who has kept me in anything remotely stylish since I've had children. She hands down things that she doesn't wear that much, and she takes me shopping when I'm really desperate. I had a few successful trips with my wonderfully sophisticated and stylish mom. But it was on one of those trips that I realized something.
I HATE the mall now. Despise it. It taunts me because nothing seems to fit right. It confuses me because I have no idea what is fashionable anymore. It laughs at me glancing at endless racks and racks of clothes that I have no idea how to put together. It frustrates me because I need so many things, and I can't figure out what to look for first. It used to be my friend. But no more. We are now sworn enemies.
Internet shopping has become a somewhat better friend. One that occaisionally still lets me down with fit, but I'm learning which retailers sell things that seem to fit me and which ones don't. If I continue to have my way, the only mall trips we will make in the future are the twice a year visits to Striderite for the boys' shoes. As long as we are in and out in an hour, I'm ok. On these trips it's hilarious to watch their faces as we explore unknown territory for them. "ALOT of people come to the mall, right Mommy?" "Why does everyone need so much stuff?" "That's a Food Court? Cool!!!!" They walk around with their mouths hanging open like hillbillies in the Big City for the first time.
Maybe one day I'll tell them how years ago their mom could walk the best stores, spot the hippest items and be headed back to the car loaded down with cute outfits in around an hour.
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