TP Reports

When I went back to work recently, I talked myself into believing that a divine intervention had occurred. I mean, I never had to update my resume or look through want ads or fill out an application. Or have an interview, God forbid. Nope, just a little rearranging of kids and I was raring to go. Although I did have some trepidation. I left there very unhappy for a variety of reasons:

1. Some people in management positions were actually cheering global warming because it was good for business.

2. Management had also recently decreed a bunch of new rules, like you couldn't have more than five personal items in your office, no plants, and no radios.

3. I had very little in common with ANYONE I worked with. I went home for lunch every day, because on the odd day when I stayed for some reason or another, and had to eat with my fellow employees, I felt so lonely and not like anyone else that I just wanted to walk out of the door and never go back.

And, on some level, I must admit

4. I felt I was not living up to my full potential and could do so much better.

So you may be asking yourself, why on EARTH did you want to go back there?

1. It's easy work.

2. It pays well.

3. It works with my schedule and doesn't take me away from my kids for very long.

4. I know they will work with me if one of them gets sick.

Etcetera Etcetera.

And the craziest part of it is that at first I was actually sad that everyone thought of me as "the temp". I'm not included in office gossip. No one can ask me to lunch because I have to eat at my desk everyday due to time constraints. I'm not in on jokes that everyone else seems to get. The company is a family, and I'm just a 4th cousin who visits once a year and nobody can remember my name.

But after about a month, I had the pleasure of realizing how much I have grown up and changed since having my kids. This is a JOB. These people are not my family, or friends. They are work acquaintances. Yes, you spend most of your time with them. And although most of them are very nice people, that doesn't mean I want to be close friends with them. And yes, management does take care of their employees. But everything they do is for the good of the company, not for you. Sometimes the nice things almost felt like blackmail. For some reason, the following song lyric comes to mind: "You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave." Because here I am back again.

Now they want me to add another day to my two days a week. Make that, the owner wants me to add another day, but this time to help out Sales, who need someone to enter orders and who knows what else. I've seen that department chew up and spit out perfectly good and smart temps just because of a few errors entering orders. The Head of Sales has worked there longer than anyone besides the owner, and she is one of the hardest people to get along with I have ever met. She is childish, spoiled, and uses language that would make a sailor blush. And used to be a pretty good friend. See, there I go using that word again. Now I realize that she was never my friend.

And then also today I find out that the Head of Sales and my current boss are having some kind of squabble. There were doors slammed to offices and muffled shouting heard by those of us in the very open-air cubicles. So much for not being included. But now that I've been sick to my stomach all day after hearing that, I am kind of ready to walk away from the whole thing. Life - and in this case my time with my kids - is MUCH TOO SHORT.