Believing, part two.

When Tito passed away, we did not think it was a good idea to take Gabriel or Joel to the visitation or the buriel, but brought Gabriel to the funeral.  He was really upset all week, and I told him I thought attending the service might be comforting to him, since it was held in our regular parish with songs he would recognize.  And I think I was right, albeit I had not thought of his questions when he saw the casket being brought in before the service started.  I wasn't very prepared to answer his, "What's that?"  But I struggled through.  Gabriel then said, "I thought Heaven was up THERE (pointing up), not down in the ground (pointing down)."  So Jav launched into a rather heroic explanation of the soul leaving the body.   This seemed to leave Gabriel wondering, but I think he was ok.

We had told him that we would visit the gravesite in a few weeks so that we could sit down and talk with Tito, because he could still hear us.  He just couldn't talk back.  This also seemed to blow Gabriel's mind a little, and I'm not sure how comfortable he was when we took both boys for a visit for the first time.  I tried to get him to talk but I could tell he thought it was weird and didn't say much.  I made a joke and asked if Tito liked his new neighbors, which Jav laughed at but Gabriel just looked sad.  Sigh.  There's just not much else you can do, I guess, other than keep the spirit of his grandfather alive by telling him stories, and visiting his gravesite in the hope that maybe it will give him some peace.  But if it keeps upsetting him maybe we need to lay off for awhile.

But none of that has to do with my story.  Soon after we got out of the car and found Tito's buriel site, we spotted a rather large white dog about 100 yards away.  It just appeared from behind one of the larger mausoleums.  I was a little concerned because I did not see a leash on it.  And Jojo gets pretty nervous around strange dogs.  I pointed it out to Jav and he started watching it too, notating that it was a pretty dog and didn't look like a stray.  But there was no owner around that we could see.  It sniffed around the mausoleum a bit, then just laid down on the grass.  Now, I like to think that I know dog behavior, and this dog was definitly not a stray.  They are way too skittish to ever lay down in the middle of the day, especially with people nearby.  And the dog never even glanced our way.

All of this started to make me feel really strange.  I looked at Jav watching the dog, and knew he was thinking some strange thoughts about it too.  We were both looking all around for an owner, but there was just no one.  Then another strange thing happened that really blew me away.  Joel started walking towards the dog!  And Joel does NOT walk towards dogs, he runs the other way.  We told him no, he needed to come back with us, because we didn't know that doggie.  The dog just continued peacefully laying in the grass, not asleep, but with his head up.  But he never looked over or seemed the least bit concerned even when Joel had been walking that direction.  Then just as suddently, the dog got up and walked back around the mausoleum where we couldn't see him any more.

By this time we were done with our visit anyway and curiousity overcame Jav and I.  We got back in the car and drove around, looking for some sign of the dog or a person, but there was nothing.  Like it had just vanished.  Jav was so overwhelmed about the whole thing he even asked the cemetary owners when he had to sign some final paperwork if any of the groundskeepers own a dog.  The gentleman looked at him very strangely and said no, they don't allow any dogs on the grounds, with the exception of one woman who visits her husband's grave with her dog every morning on a leash.  And her dog is not white.

So, without voicing it at the time to each other, we both thought it might have been Tito.  When we were talking about it the week afterward, Jav had told Sandra our story.  She reminded Jav about their family Christmas ornaments.  They each picked out ornaments to represent themselves on the tree, years ago.  Jav's dad picked out a white dog.  I wish I could explain more about the moment, how very at ease the dog was.  How peaceful the time was while we were all out there.  I now believe, without a doubt, that it was him, welcoming us to his body's new resting place, and trying to make us feel better.