Just some baby stuff

When I was pregnant with Gabriel, his defining characteristic was that he got the hiccups. All the time, all day long. But I don't remember him moving around very much at night.

This baby (and we have picked out a name but are going to wait to tell everybody except for Gabriel), has had the hiccups a few times in the past few weeks. But his defining characteristic is that he likes to move. Especially at night. All. Night. Long. Which both thrills me and wears me out a little. And it's not just in one spot, so either he's huge already or he really knows how to get around in there. So I can pretty much guarantee he already has his days and nights mixed up.

Gabriel has started saying good morning and good night to his baby brother and kissing my belly. It's really sweet and I think he's starting to grasp what's happening and get excited about it. On PBS there is a little daycare-like setting in between shows where they teach preschool type things. One day recently they were supposed to make a scrapbook with pictures showing what made them different from other kids. At one point the teacher asked the kids at home if they have any brothers or sisters and Gabriel shouted YES!.

Pretty cool.

Big boy bed!

We finally put together Gabriel's bed Sunday, and I was (of course) a little apprehensive about how he would adapt. Even though we've been talking it up for weeks, he seemed a tiny bit worried when they started taking down his crib. But when Jav and his Dad started bringing the pieces of the new bed in, he started to get excited and even wanted to help. I caught him at one point in the kitchen banging on the wall with a REAL hammer, luckily before any damage was done. The first night I woke up once an hour thinking he might be scared or confused. But he's been doing great, and sleeping all the way through the night and having pretty good naps too. So far he's still waiting for me to come and get him out of it in the mornings, but yesterday he was already on the floor playing after he woke up from his nap. He's pictured above with his two Curious Georges, one of which belong back at his grandmothers house. They are his best buddies right now.

Busy, busy, busy

I feel like our house is just a nonstop whirlwind of activity lately. There seems to be so much going on.

I'm fully within the nesting phase right now. I'm having Jav rearrange furniture in the whole house, not just kid rooms. I've decided you need to live in a house at least three or four years before you should buy any new furniture. Some of our early big and bulky purchases just don't work in our rather small family area, due to some strange quirks in our house. One is the angled fireplace. It's pretty to look at, but it cuts off an entire chunk of the room and really limits our space. Another is the floor being at a slightly different level halfway across the living room (which used to be two rooms until previous owners decided to take the wall out). The result of these two things is that we're having to try out different arrangements of the furniture to see if anything works best.

I've got several other projects going right now. I'm trying to clean out closets, drawers and cabinets to make room for baby stuff. I had 7 bags of clothes and other stuff that I gave away with the first sweep, and I'll have another 6 or so for this coming Friday. I'm also working on trying to catch up and straighten up our pictures. We had saved some to one website, and the rest to another. So now I've got them all in one place, and all backed up to an external drive. I still need to catch up on copying the last-year ones from the computer to both places now. THEN I need to figure out which ones we've printed out and which ones never got printed. THEN I want to start putting them in albums, in our hallway gallery, and into a makeshift scrap/baby book for Gabriel. All before the next one arrives. Good luck with all that.

Gabriel's birthday is fast approaching, though, so the month of September I'll stop doing all of this and concentrate on getting the house and yard ready for his birthday party. This is always a great excuse to do some Fall cleaning. I want to clean the windows, inside and out, clean blinds and cabinets and baseboards and ceiling fans, hose off the front and back porch, and wipe down all of our wood furniture with lemon oil. Since I am moving slower than normal, this will take me the entire six Mother's Day Out days I'll have until his party.

His theme this year is dinosaurs, but the only things I'm really incorporating that into are the centerpiece for the cake, the actual cake and a pinata. We're working on his gifts, and finally decided to chock up the money for a swing set this year. His Godparents are going in on it with us, and (God bless 'em) have agreed to come and help Jav put it together. He's going to be so excited!!!

Mother's Day Out starts back up on September 8th, and I think I have all my ducks in a row ready for it. I got my immunization update signed by his doctor, and we'll go "meet" his teacher on September 2nd. The assistant teacher from his class last year will be his main teacher this year - yay! He absolutely loved Ms. Amy, so I know he's going to be fine.

So I'm trying to do all of this, plus walk Molly three mornings a week and do my pregnancy yoga fat-burning DVD three times a week. And do you know that the nurse practitioner at my OB/GYN had the nerve to suggest I might want to try 7 days of exercise to slow down my weight gain? Is she nuts?

End of summer fun

They've been replacing our sewer pipes and Gabriel's been in absolute heaven! These were taken after the guys went home a few nights ago.

He wanted me to take his picture with Molly after running around in the water yesterday.

He looks so big to me all of a sudden!

Late birthday pics

Sandra and boyfriend (and gourmet cook) Michael, who made a birthday lunch for me that was wonderful.

Our little prodigy, who never really just bangs the keys, but seems to have a plan every time he sits down at the piano. One day I'd love to find a used piano on Craig's List.

Luckily he at least waited until the candles were blown out before licking the icing off of them!

Gabriel and his Tito. I think he was begging for even more cake.

Love, love, love this boy!

Poignant moments

We don't have many channels that we regularly check on TV. We have a tendency to stick to Public TV, Turner Classic Movies, Independent Film Channel, ESPN (Javi, not me so much), Bravo, and TLC. That's pretty much all we surf if we're not watching something on the DVR or a Ranger game. Last night, I was checking these and happened on a concert on KERA, our Public TV station. It was Chris Botti, who is a trumpet player that is popular on "Smooth Jazz" stations, I believe. I'm not a fan of smooth jazz-it's one of the few genres I just can't get into. But I stayed with it because the female guest that came out was singing "I've Got You Under My Skin", and he had a great Big Band and Orchestra behind him, and I'm a sucker for those kinds of tunes. We found out afterwards she was Kathryn McPhee, who was a runner up on American Idol one year. The music was good, but the cheesy flirting between she and Botti drove me a little nuts and we decided to watch one of our 15 episodes that we are behind on The Office. I'm not sure why we stopped watching it last year, but we did, and now we're trying to get caught up before the new season starts.

When we finished our episode, the show was still on, with Yo Yo Ma playing a number with Botti. I love Yo Yo Ma, and think he is one of the greatest artists of our time, but the song was ending and Jav had to ruin what was left by asking, "Is that Yo Yo Ma Ma?" which is what he thought his name was for the longest time. And I think he thought he was a rapper instead of a cellist. Anyway, we were about to change the channel when the next special guest to walk out was Steven Tyler. Yep, that one. The androgynous, flamboyant lead singer for Aerosmith? And as of late has been in the news for falling off the stage during a concert? (It's tough being a aging rock star). Well, as he strutted to the front of the stage carrying his signature bandana wrapped microphone, we were intrigued, to say the least, to see what would happen. What happened was one of the most moving and surprising performances I've seen in a while, and one I won't ever forget. He sang the song "Smile", a beautiful song that Charlie Chaplin wrote the music for and used in the movie Modern Times. The lyrics are trying to get you to just smile even though your heart is breaking, so for me it ends up being a really sad song. Tyler put so much feeling into that song I can't even describe it, and his voice sounded so clear. They kept showing the front row of the mostly late middle-aged to elderly audience as he sang, and I thought, "I bet they were dreading this part of the show, but they all look as surprised as I am". When he finished he introduced his Dad, who had been one of those elderly gentlemen in that row, and I actually got teary-eyed. I have a newfound respect for the man.

Forty-two, fat and happy

I had a great birthday yesterday.  I was originally dreading this birthday, because a year ago I knew we would probably stop trying to have another kid and that made me sad.  Little did I know what life had in store for me!

I started out my day with a nice walk with Molly, something that always gives me energy and makes me happy.  We're not going as long as we used to, but I'm still managing to get out there with her three times a week, and plan to continue that unless someone tells me not to.  When I got home, I checked my computer and found lots of really sweet birthday wishes on Facebook, which made me feel really good.

Gabriel and I shared our bowl of yogurt, blueberries and granola while watching Elmo, something that has become a nice routine during the summer.  My Mom came over and we three went to the mall to get Gabriel's big-boy comforter ordered, and since sheets were on sale I took care of those too.  I also had to buy a few more t-shirts in larger sizes to get me through the next four (you've got to be kidding me) months.  

Mom took us out to lunch at Chili's, where Gabriel ate almost all of his quesadilla and most of his Mandarin oranges.  Mom and I chose burgers (there's no where else that does them better, I think) and fries.  Then we went back home and had big bowls of cookies and cream ice cream.  We were all three very full but very happy campers!  

Gabriel took a nap, which is touch and go these days.  Which meant I got one too.  Our therapy coordinator LaToya came after we woke up and was as excited as I've been about Gabriel's speech improving exponentially the past week.  It's looking more and more like we might not need more therapy after he ages-out of their program in September.  Gabriel even requested and sang his favorite current song while she was here:  Happy Together by the Turtles.  

Then Gabriel and I cuddled up on my bed and watched The Wizard of Oz.  I know I'm supposed to be rationing his viewings, but hey, it was my birthday.  He had his head on my shoulder and the baby started kicking, and I felt so amazingly happy I could have cried.  The only thing missing was my wonderful husband, who was on his way bringing dinner home.  And I continued to get birthday wishes from friends and family all day long, ending with Macy's phone call in her sweet little voice telling me happy birthday and that she was watching The Cat in the Hat.

After our Chic-Fil-A feast (I was good and had a wrap and carrot salad, ok and maybe a couple of Gabriel's waffle fries), it was time for cards and gifts.  But the best part was hearing Gabriel sing happy birthday to me for the first time.  I was also pretty excited about getting one of the things on my list - a croquet set!  I foresee hours of fun when the family comes over, it brings back so many memories of the fun we used to have at my grandparents' playing.  Plus it's one of the few games I can actually play right now!

After we got Gabriel to sleep, Jav and I watched the Ranger game, playing in probably the most important series of this season against the Angels.  But both pitchers were working slow as Christmas, and it turned into a very long game.  So I worked my crossword until I fell asleep, and I'm not sure if they won or not.  

But even if they didn't, I'd still say I had a perfect day yesterday.  Who knew forty-two could be this great?

Well, Bust my Buttons!

We watched The Wizard of Oz with Gabriel for the first time about a month ago, and I didn't expect him to watch very much of it.  He surprised us by sitting through the entire movie, and asking afterwards one of his favorite questions, "Dude it again?"  He just loved it, and never was afraid of anything (that might come a few years down the road).  

I remembered how much I loved the movie as a kid, but some of it really frightened me (especially the first time they all meet the Wizard, and the part when the witch takes Toto from Dorothy).  I also remember that I only got to watch it once a year, because that's the only time it showed on network TV.  I'm the first to celebrate the person who invented the DVR, because otherwise I'd be stuck watching what's on every night from 9:3o to 11:00 pm, the only time I get to watch TV.  But it does sort of take away the specialness of only getting to watch something once or twice a year.  So I'm trying to at least limit him to about once a month.  

But it's fun to see him get excited about something I loved too.  In fact, besides seeing your kids get excited about learning something new or being proud of themselves, the best part about being a parent is sharing nostalgic things with them.   Gabriel's favorite phrase to show off right now is the title of this post, uttered by the frazzled Gatekeeper of the Emerald City when he sees the ruby slippers on Dorothy's feet.  He says it perfectly, and it cracks me up every time.

Movie review - Frida

I finally got Jav to watch the movie Frida with me last week.  He doesn't really like Salma Hayek (I know, does he have a pulse?), so was very hesitant to watch it.  But I kept pushing and telling him that Albert Molina, who portrays Diego Rivera in the movie, really should have shared top billing with her.  He ended up really liking it (which I knew he would).  

Julie Taymor directed the movie.  I had seen pictures, moving and stills, of her work on the staged version of The Lion King, and thought her work was pretty amazing.  Then I watched Titus, an adaptation of the Shakespeare play with Anthony Hopkins, which she directed.  It was an extremely bloody movie, but the look of it was so cool I couldn't stop watching.  So when I heard she was directing the story of tortured artist Frida Kahlo, I was roped in from the beginning.  I love movies about tortured artists.  

This movie has it all.  The acting from both leads is top-notch.  You feel like you are really watching these two artists and what they went through and totally forget you are watching a movie, which means terrific acting in my book.  Hayek was nominated for best actress but did not win.  Molina was not nominated at all, which is a true crime.  I can't put into words how good his performance is.  If you liked him in Chocolate, with his understated performance of a passionate man trying to quell his passions because of what people might think, you will be shocked by this completely opposite performance.  Diego Rivera was a man who didn't quell anything he felt or wanted to say!  And Molina makes not just his lustiness for women, but his strong political views and artistic perspective seem larger than life.

The movie also has a great supporting cast, including Edward Norton, Ashley Judd and Geoffrey Rush in a scene-stealing performance as Leon Trotsky.  The music throughout the movie is also wonderful, especially the tango between Kahlo and Ashley Judd's character, Italian-born photographer and political activist Tina Modotti.  The original score and the makeup won Oscars.  I also love the symbolism throughout the movie and the scenes showing the viewer how certain moments in Kahlo's life led directly to her art.  You will be looking at a still painting and all of  a sudden it comes to life on the screen.  Very, very cool.  

Size is relative

I'm thinking this baby is going to be a whopper.  

I feel like I'm already as big as I was towards the end with Gabriel, and I have four months to go!  And I feel like I'm going to pop.  All the time.  The things is, I'm eating healthier with this one than I did with Gabriel, and I'm exercising much more.  But the weight keeps coming (along with the need for bigger and bigger clothes).  I didn't know underwear sizes went up that high!  My first priority was to get some more comfortable fitting clothes to see if that helps the tightness at all.  And my second strategy is to try really, really hard to eat smaller meals.  Sometimes I do pretty good, but sometimes (like today at lunch) I blow that one.  

I figured out one of the reasons I'm so much more tired this time is not only because I'm bigger, but because with Gabriel I had a desk job where I put my feet up for most of the day.  I try to sit here and there at home, but it's impossible chasing after Gabriel.  I've almost given up playing with him in his room because it involves sitting on the floor and getting up again probably 10 times every 15 minutes.   He's starting to think I'm the most un-fun Mommy EVER.  No wrestling, no piggy-back rides, no crazy dancing where I swing him around anymore.  I miss it like crazy, but I'm so happy for the reason.  I just hope he forgives me eventually.

Hmmmmm

I wanted to post this on Facebook, but didn't quite have the nerve.

Gabriel just picked up my bra and said, "Mama's hat!"

Not sure if that says more about the size of my chest or the size of my head!

The dreams of youth

I really try to stay in the present, but rarely succeed.  I find myself already daydreaming sometimes about the lives my kids will have when they grow up.  My problem when I was growing up was that I had no long-term dreams.  I had a short-term goal in high school to have a boyfriend.  That was all I cared about, I realize now when I look back.  I don't think I cared that much about grades, friends or even family as much as I wanted to have a boyfriend.  WHAT AN IDIOT I WAS!  

Once I got to college, I had so many interests but I couldn't decide which one I liked best for a career.  I started out with Business Administration, then switched to History, then dropped out all together.  When I went back I thought about Art History for awhile, but by then my marriage was so bad I realized deep down somewhere that I would have to find something I could actually earn a living with, and that wasn't going to be it.  I settled on Accounting after taking the Intro course and breezing through it.  It paid off as a money-making decision, but never has done much for my soul.  

I think sometimes about the different courses my life could have taken, when you have those tiny moments in life where you could go one way or the other, and then can't go back.   When I was in my senior year (after attending for 10 years on and off) of college, one of my Economics professors thought very highly of my performance in his advanced money and banking course and recommended me to be in the Economics Graduate Program.  I met the dean and they asked what my interests were, and when I told them I was really interested in the Environment they were very excited because so many programs were just beginning in that field.  But I knew I needed a real job, and work-study wasn't going to work.  I sometimes wonder what would have happened if I had decided to somehow try that course.  Maybe I'd even have worked my way up to be an advisor to the Obama administration.  (Well, we are talking about dreams, after all).  

So I've never really achieved much of a level of greatness.   Getting married to a wonderful man and having a child has been my greatest achievement, along with turning my life around from a horrible marriage, drawn out divorce and several really bad relationship choices.  Having this little family makes me proud of what I do, more than any job has (or ever will, I'm sure).  I'm proud at how much I've grown to appreciate my parents and in-laws and entire immediate family.  I'm proud that I am trying to be a better friend than I used to be.  I'm also proud that I was brave enough to ask our Homeowner's Association Newsletter Editor if I could start writing a Going Green article every month.  My writing has become better each month, and even though I gripe about having to do it beforehand each month, I am always really proud of myself when I see the article.  I realize that this may be my only shot at reaching people about something I really believe in, and if even one or two people change their thinking about their lifestyles, then I have achieved what I set out to do.  I might take a month or two off when the baby comes, but I hope to get right back to it as soon as the sleep deprivation wears off.

I think it would be great if either of my kids decides what they want to do in life early and starts to pursue a goal for themselves.  But I think I'll also be ok if they flounder around for awhile.  I just want them to be happy.  And after all, I turned out ok.

Neighborhood

The appearance of the fire truck at the end of our 4th of July Parade always causes great excitement.

This year we even had horses, which was my second favorite part.

THIS is my favorite part.  This is LaWayne, who puts together the monthly newsletter and her recently purchased El Camino.  I love it!!!

Gabriel was much happier than he looks in this picture.

The basketball goal that George and Billie gave us recently.  Their granddaughter, who is 11, finally outgrew it.

There are some who would have doubts about living in our neighborhood, and I will admit that we are in the midst of the "hood" and hear gunshots about once or twice a month.  I doubt anyone would pick our neighborhood for the school system either.  But I have grown to love this neighborhood during the three and a half years we've lived here.  We have an active neighborhood association with a great newsletter.  They have formed groups to fight various things threatening our area and have fought city hall on many occasions.  We all pulled together as a neighborhood and got the gas people to drill on the absolute outskirts of our neighborhood, and because so many held out we were paid handily for our acreage.  We have a neighborhood patrol in which residents volunteer to slowly drive the area for one hour apiece to watch for any suspicious activity.  Because of this group's vigilance, we have one of the lowest crime rates of any neighborhood in Fort Worth.  

And we have some really great neighbors.  I've talked on this blog about George and Billie next door.  They are in their eighties, but very spry and cognizant, and just the nicest people.  I take Gabriel over to play about once a month, and he loves them like another set of grandparents.  We bring each other cookies and banana bread, and chat in the yard every time we're both outside, which seems like all the time.  I've spoken about Helen too, the widow who lives across the street.  We go to the grocery store together once a week, and are becoming better and better friends.  When we called and emailed our friends and family to let them know about Jav getting a job, Helen and George and Billie were also on the list of people to call right away.  I would like to have them over for dinner sometime.  We don't know our other neighbors as well, but are on a first name basis with most of them, which feels good.

I love how diverse our neighborhood is, too.  We have a span of ages from young families with small children (younger than us, of course), families with teenagers, empty nesters, very elderly, and everything in between.  We have every race.  We have a representation of same-sex couples.  It was pretty neat to see all of these different groups represented at our recent annual 4th of July parade.  It was a fantastic turnout and an event that we now really look forward to (especially Gabriel due to the appearance of the fire truck at the end of the parade every year.)   Wednesday night we've been asked to show up with children in tow at our Park Association meeting to try and canvas for new playground equipment.  We're going, and hope to meet some more parents with young kids (besides the few I've met through the neighborhood Moms' Group.)  

I had some doubts about what it would be like when we moved in, but I am now convinced it's a great place to bring up our kids.

To get caught up, part two

June was a tough month for me.  I went from having doctor appointments every week to having to wait a whole month.  Even though I hit three months, and was supposed to stop worrying, I actually worried more and even went to the doctor once due to lower abdominal pain.  But everything was good.  When I would get really low, I would remember our wedding.  We had that one big rain shower that started when the ceremony began and ended just after the ceremony was ending, almost like God custom-made it for us.  The Lutheran bishop who married us claimed that it was good luck and meant fertility.  I know this sounds a little crazy, but I needed to find something to get me thinking positively, and it always seemed to work.  

We had the final round of our Early Testing in late June and got the best report we could have received for my age.  All development looked really good, and our chances of birth defects were greatly diminished.  We were pretty determined upon finding out about this pregnancy to NOT find out what we were having until the birth.  But, of course, we caved.  And found out within 20 seconds of the ultrasound starting that we were having another bouncing baby boy.  We really did not care either way, as long as it was a healthy baby.  I'm sure I'll have sad moments here and there in my life about not having the opportunity to have a daughter, and I'm a little sad that Jav won't get to have that truly special father/daughter relationship.  But even since high school I always had a feeling I'd have two boys, and would always pick out boys names when I dreamed of having kids one day.  I just had to wait a while to have my dream come true!

Also in June, Gabriel started going to Kindermuzic class once a week.  He was shy at first, but seemed to like it ok.  He really loosened up by the last class and was running around singing and spinning.  Our speech therapist advised us it would probably be really good for him to keep interacting with kids his own age during the summer.  We just started the second session but we're at a different church with a different teacher and all new kids.  Plus there's 10 kids compared to 4 in the last class.  The teacher for the first session, Miss Meagan, was young and unorganized and all over the place, but Gabriel really loved her.  The new teacher, Miss Bailey, is twice as old, very organized and structured, and quieter.  Time will tell if he starts to warm up to her, and the whole class.

We had our very fun and MUCH NEEDED Annual Girls' Trip with Julie, Audra and Jana, which ended up having to be only one night and in Fort Worth this year.  But we ate at Mexican Inn to get our trip started, stayed at the Worthington, browsed at the downtown Barnes and Noble, ate downtown  at Pizzeria Uno and then the next day decided on a whim to visit the stockyards, something none of us had ever done as tourists before.  We got there just in time to see the cattle drive down the street!  And we ate..... and ate..... and ate....then ate some more.  Julie kicked our butts playing the Seinfeld trivia game.  We tried an intervention to get Auddie onto Facebook, but failed.  And, of course, we laughed and laughed and laughed.  I'm already needing the next trip.  

I loved seeing Julie and the kids for their stay in Fort Worth.  Julie's book club meeting was fun, even though we didn't talk much about the book (which I'm halfway through and really liking) and opted for getting caught up while sitting around the dinner table.  We had tickets for a Ranger game, which I never thought I'd be able to attend due to the 100+ heat, but a freakish cool front blew through the night before our game and we got to go.  Oh how I've missed those games!!  I think we need to have a goal one day of going to a Ranger game at Yankee stadium, even though we may need to quietly cheer our guys on.  Those Yankee fans can be a bit scary!

And to wrap up my wrap up of what I've missed writing about, Jav got a job on July 8th.  It's a fantastic company called Aramark, and I can't tell you how happy and relieved we are.  He had to go through a phone interview and 4 in-person interviews, which was grueling but paid off in the end.  He beat out 80 other applicants, including two from inside the company.  I'm so proud of him!!!!  That really says something in this economy.  Our benefits through the old job run out August 31st, and the new ones kick in September 1st.  If that's not God taking care of us, I just don't know what is.  (And it's the same insurance company, so no worries about changing doctors and all of that)!  

Well, I think that gets me caught up.   There really is something to the theory about Pregnant Brain, and most of the time lately I just don't want to think that hard, but I am going to make an effort to post something at least once a week.

To get caught up, part one

Where the heck have I been?  Well, it's been a crazy couple of months, to say the least.  And I've been spending too much time on Facebook.  I need to post what's been happening so when we read back on my posts years from now, we won't wonder what happened during the missing three months.

The week before Easter I found out I was pregnant.  This was so crazy and unexpected.  I hadn't been paying attention to a calendar and had been really busy having the book club and then the family over for an early Easter.  I was almost 8 weeks along when I went to the doctor to confirm.  Jav looked at me as if I was speaking Swahili when I told him.  We had decided to stop trying and start really looking into adoption.  We were very excited, but I was also very, very concerned that I would lose another pregnancy.

At the end of the next week, Jav got laid off from his job.  They had recently been bought out by a big company and of course the big company decided they didn't need all the people from the little company.  We had been worried it might happen but hopeful it wouldn't.  We were still really stunned when it did.  

The next weeks are filled with doctors appointments for me, once a week to make sure things were still going well.  Surprisingly to me, they were.  I also remember Gabriel's last few weeks of school, and that he got really sick for the last week and couldn't go to any of the parties, which made me sad.  He had a fever that wouldn't go away and developed fever blisters at the back of his throat.  He stopped eating almost anything for a couple of days, which was a little scary.  It took him two weeks to get back to normal.  

It was strange having Jav at home during the day, but also a blessing because I was queasy from 3 pm to bedtime almost every day.  He would watch Gabriel from 5-6 every night so I could rest up before cooking dinner.  This was a hellish task during that time, but not as bad as cleaning up afterwards.  But we made it through with only a couple of extra take-out nights.  I have to make note of my very crazy and specific cravings I had during the first three months.  One really weird thing is that just before I found out I was pregnant with Gabriel I started craving pickled okra (not something we usually have on hand).  And just about every time I've been pregnant, I've crave it the week before I find out.  It happened with this one too, but I didn't ever put two and two together.  My favorite thing to eat during the first three months was bean and cheese nachos with tons of lettuce, tomato and peppers on top.  I also loved eating salads with butter lettuce, picked beets, sliced avocado and Ranch dressing.  It had to be the Ranch from the envelope, not bottled.  Anything I drank had to be ice-cold.  And the only sweet that tasted really good was Cookies and Cream ice cream.

There were many other things we kept busy with during this time.  We went to Prairiefest in late April, but it was a really hot day and we didn't stay too long.  I had several book club meetings, which are always fun.  Gabriel had his speech therapy sessions and really improved in both sentence length and pronunciation during this time.  We celebrated our 5-year anniversary and my sister-in-law's 40th birthday with a wonderful dinner at Nonna Tata's.  I listened to much of the Van Cliburn piano competition on the TCU radio station, especially while doing the dishes every evening.  

We went to one adoption orientation meeting in late April, with me thinking that if we received bad news about the pregnancy we would at least have started the ball rolling.  This was also despite the fact that we knew we would have no way to fund an adoption with Jav not working.  But the thing I'll remember most about that meeting is walking out feeling so blessed to have had the chance to have even one child.  There were 20-odd couples at that meeting and there was only one other couple besides us that had their own child.  And there I was with one at home and one growing inside of me.  I almost felt guilty, but my guilt was overcome with compassion for the women, and an overwhelming feeling of thankfulness for what we have.  

Well, that's the first month and a half from our Missing in Action period.  I'll finish up next post.

The late great Robert Shaw

As far as character actors go, if you remember more about them than the leads in the movie, you've found a great one.  Robert Shaw has been a favorite of mine even before I realized it.  Of course his most famous role was in Jaws as Quint, the salty sea dog hired to help Roy Scheider and Richard Dreyfuss track down and kill the Great White.  He's also well remembered for his role in The Sting as a ruthless gangster, and the target of one of the most well-orchestrated snow jobs in the history of film.  I first loved him in The Deep, as yet another salty dog, this one a diving treasure hunter who helps Nick Nolte and Jacqueline Bisset dig up a Spanish treasure and blow up thousands of bottles of morphine so the evil drug lord can't get to them.  Jav and I happened to catch this movie one night last week, and got hooked all over again, even though it had been about 20 years since either of us had seen it (although Jav pouted the entire movie because we missed the beginning with Bisset diving in only her very see-through white tee shirt and bikini bottoms.  God-get over it!).  Shaw was the glue that held the movie together, and not only that but he made it classier and much more interesting to watch.

I think the word I'm looking for to describe what he had is "charisma".  He had a turbulent personal life - married three times and had twelve kids between the three of them.  He seemed to be cut from the same cloth as other great English actors initially trained in the theater like Peter O'Toole and Richard Harris.  They were all so talented but drank way, way too much their entire lives.  He died at the relatively young age of 51 of a heart attack.  

I'm not sure why Shaw doesn't get the same props for his acting as some of those other English actors.  I just know I want to try to see everything he's been in, because at least the scenes he's in will be good.  I did have the pleasure of seeing his Academy Award nominated performance as Henry the 8th in A Man For All Seasons, which is a wonderful movie if you're in a historical mood.  And now Jav tells me that Shaw is in the original The Taking of Pelham One Two Three as the orchestrator of the kidnappings.  So it will be going on our Netflix list!

 

Movie cravings

Do you ever have a craving to watch a certain movie?  I've had one for about a month now to watch Rear Window.  It's like I need a fix or something.  Every day I've been checking Turner Movie Classics in the hopes that they were doing an Alfred Hitchcock night, but to no avail.  Today I finally decided to do a search on it, and lo and behold they are doing an entire Alfred Hitchcock day on June 27th!!!!  They are also showing Notorious, North by Northwest and The Man Who Knew Too Much.  I think I may ship Gabriel off to a grandparent or two and have myself a marathon!!!  (Jav can join me, I know he really likes them too.  As long as he provides me with food all day long).

Why hasn't anyone invented a service where you can go to some channel on your TV, find the movie you are craving to watch, and pull it up right then and there?  (For a small fee, of course).  You'd think someone would have come up with a way to do that by now.

Sunday Picnic

We decided this morning to pack up some lunch and take Gabriel for a picnic.  We haven't done this since he was very small (9 months old, I think), so this will be the first one he remembers.  We went to a park pretty close to our house (brave of us, but it turned out well), that has some shady spots and a small lake with ducks to walk around.  Gabriel wanted to play on the playground, but we explained that we were there to have lunch and then take a walk, and it was too hot to play on the playground, which wasn't shaded at all.  

He finally understood the concept and happily ate his PB & J and barbecue chips.  Then he and Jav kicked the ball around that we brought, knowing that he is all of sudden REALLY into kicking the ball.  We walked around the path down towards the water, but it was too muddy to get very close, and the turtle that had been sunning on a stump jumped in the water when he heard us coming.  I was hoping Gabriel could look at some ducks or a turtle up close with his homemade binoculars, but he had to settle for a far away view.  

We were starting to get really hot so we headed back to the car.  That's when the miracle occurred!  The distinct chimes of an ice cream truck.  Gabriel had his crazy arms going he got so excited.  We all shared one cone and decided our spontaneous picnic had been an enormous success!

Nostalgia: Fredericksburg, part 2

Enchanted Rock (I have no idea who's in the picture, it was the biggest one I could find).

Part two of my stroll back down memory lane in Fredericksburg is the fun stuff we did around town.

Enchanted Rock (now a State Park) is a 425 foot high granite batholith, the largest in the United States.  A batholith, for my geographically-challenged friends, is an underground rock formation left uncovered by erosion.  (OK-I admit I had to look that up.  I thought it was just a huge chunk of granite).  The Tonkowa Indians believed the rock to be haunted due to fires that appeared at night and strange sounds heard at all hours.  (Scientists guess this was the noise of the big rock expanding and contracting from being heated during the day and cooled at night).  We used to take day trips, sometimes with picnics, and hike to the top.  I highly recommend this to families because it's an easy climb for youngsters with all the smooth rocks to grab onto, and it's not very steep.  But the view from the top is beautiful, and truly enchanting.  Some years ago they started limiting the number of people who get to enter the park each day, so plan to go early if you go.  Gabriel is almost big enough to try a climb, and I can't wait to take him.

Another hike we would make often on our trips was to Balanced Rock.  It was a big round boulder that was balanced on a small triangular rock point.  Here's a postcard I found while searching around for its history.  I'm having trouble finding history, but I guess it was supposed to be another geological wonder.  I have a great picture somewhere of my Dad, with full 70's sideburns, pretending to hold the rock on the pedestal with one arm and showing off his biceps with the other.  I'm sure this pose was repeated countless times by countless families.  But sadly today the rock no longer exists.  There are several different theories as to the cause.  One theory is that a bunch drunk teenagers shoved it off the pedestal and it broke into pieces.  Another is that the quarry who owned the land it was located on actually blew it up in order to avoid having the state protect the land and turn it into a State Park, or that they were afraid of lawsuits from tourists injuring themselves climbing up to see it.  Either way, it's another little cool piece of my history that's gone now.

And finally, there was the charm of strolling around the town of Fredericksburg itself.  Back then it was just starting to become a tourist destination, but even then we tended to avoid the touristy spots on Main Street for the locally-owned and local-frequented stores.  We would visit Knopp-Metzger department store, Birck's Butcher Shop and Barbecue Restaurant, and the Dietz Bakery, which somehow has survived the onslaught of Wal-Mart and many other new bakeries.  These were the merchants who made German small-town living so special.  These days, the streets and shops are all very crowded, everything for sale is overpriced, and the shops are owned by people who relocated to Fredericksburg to cash in on the tourism.  It's still fun to browse all the shops, eat a Reuben at the deli, and drink a homebrewed beer as you walk down the street and people watch, but once again, just not the same.  There are still a few spots to catch the charm - breakfast at Andy's Diner on Sunday morning, where many of the old school Germans gather either before or after church, and walking or driving along the neighborhood streets to see the beautiful houses and flower gardens. or attending Mass at the old Catholic church with it's beautiful masonry and stained glass.  

I have made many visits with Jav, but he has yet to see some of the things that made Fredericksburg so special because we choose to spend time with our relatives rather than sightsee during our time there.  But someday I hope to show him some of the things I loved as a child, if they don't all disappear before then.

Nostalgia: Fredericksburg, part 1

I haven't felt much like posting lately.  Our life is a little crazy right now and so I am going to talk about the past instead of the present.  I've been having these flashes of nostalgia for certain things, with strong sensory memories of smell and taste, and just the joyous times my Mom, Dad, brother and I used to share.  

We had two places we traveled in the summers when we were kids, Fredericksburg and Ingelside (a tiny town just outside of Corpus).  Both places were full of relatives.  Fredericksburg was the home of my grandmother and her brothers and sisters, and we would always stay with Uncle Robert and Aunt Lou.   Uncle Robert is my grandmother's youngest brother, and the only sibling still alive today.  He was very tall, 6'5" (before old-age shrinkage started settling in), very German, was a carpenter by trade, could be found at all hours in his smokehouse making venison sausage and other wonderful meats, loved to bow hunt, was a fantastic cook and gardener (and still is, I might add), and had one of best senses of humor ever.  He still makes me belly laugh at least a couple of times every time we visit.  Oh, and he also played tennis at least once a week, until his knees and back finally gave out on him in his eighties!  What a renaissance man!

My Aunt Lou is also still alive.  She is also a wonderful cook and bakes, and one of the things I've been EXTREMELY nostalgic about lately is her homemade brown bread.  I remember waking up and going into the dining room with the smell of slab bacon cooking and Aunt Lou's toast in my nose, immediately rendering me starving!  They would pass around big platters of both, and a big bowl of scrambled eggs.  But that bread!   All you needed was a big slab of butter and you had died and gone to heaven, my friend.  It was a little sweet just on its own, so honey or jam added was just icing on the cake.  I'm not sure if she still makes it these days, so I will just have to live with the memory of the smell and taste.  

It's funny the things you remember as a kid, the things that stand out in my mind from those trips.  I remember how I loved sleeping in the huge beds that were waaaaayyyy up off the floor.  It made me feel like a princess.  I remember hanging out in the backyard with Uncle Robert with the smokehouse smell always nearby, and loving the big stepping stones they had going from the house out to the back of their property.  But the thing I remember most is the laughter.  Not only did they have three kids (two of which had families of their own by then), but usually for our visits my grandparents and another of my grandmother's brothers and his wife, Uncle Jack and Aunt Gina, would all be sitting around either in the house or in the backyard catching up and telling stories.  Eventually someone would say something funny, or misunderstand something, or get the story wrong and start arguing.  But we would all end up laughing and laughing until tears were running down our faces and our stomachs hurt.  At least four or five times a day!  There is nothing more comforting to a kid than being surrounded by people you love, and that you know love you, and having all that happiness flowing over you.  

This is one thing I fret about, that I won't be able to give Gabriel quite the same experience.  Things are so different now, so many people from my past are gone.  It was a different era, and things seemed to move alot slower back then.  Families were bigger and talked more.  But I SOOOOO want him to have those happy memories once he's grown.  At least he has met Uncle Robert and Aunt Lou, and we are definitely overdue for another visit.  But it's not the same due to their age (I think they are both in their 90's now) and the fact that their kids and their families are spread out.  But at least I call tell him about that other time and hope some of it seeps into his conscience.